The Philippine Online Chronicles

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Stuck at home because of heavy rains that looked like an Ondoy waiting to happen ( I had crossed fingers the whole day), I found myself brushing with my fingers the edge of my headboard (a good high ground where my  DVDs are stacked so my dog won’t devour them) for good movies to watch. I suddenly realized that my collection is composed of those I had bargained from Quiapo for the cheap price and not really the shows that represent me. Yes, I believe that one’s DVD collection should be representative of her/himself.

I have a few which I really want and I’d watch over and over and I’d impose on everyone  to not miss while they live.  And so while I’m at it, and while this rain is torturing me with cold and wet dog odor, let me share my favorite shows which I’d impose on you all to not miss while you still breath and while we have outraged monsoon ruining our shopping schedules. Most of them, if not all, are Hollywood. I won’t justify and there is no guilt in this.

Romy and Michele’s High School Reunion

We all love it when we see mean girls down. This movie is our revenge to those who have been very mean to us.  And this movie made me reflect on what I would do to the mean girls of my childhood when we meet again. And with the help of Facebook, retaliatory plans are sweeter  since we know that everyone got fat, the pretty ones looked like tired mothers (brake!), and the handsome guys who had ignored us now looked like one of those we would just ignore even if they begged for attention. This movie may have been about trying to discover beautiful things in people we think as strange but really for me, this gave me inspiration to just get back at them with smirk on my face that said, “God, I’m good looking, and you all look sad.”

Michele: Oh, okay. Um, I invented Post-Its.

 

The Craft

This movie for me is the signature of the MTV generation where most my age are walking entities of darkness and when angry poetry was common to teens. This also gave me license to wear black lipstick and black nail polish and I felt like Fairuza Balk that I could break anyone’s neck with a whisper of a chant. This movie made me want to be a witch. A friend even bought candles and witchcraft books.

Nancy: You know, in the old days, if a witch betrayed her coven, they would kill her.

 

Jawbreaker

Jawbreaker is one of my most favorite make-over movie. Watching the movie, I felt that the nerdy Fern Mayo did the right thing in siding with the evil in exchange of a make-over and a nook in the ranks of the Queen Bees as Vylette. I mean sometimes we are pushed to the dark side to satisfy our little vanities, right? Like charging too much to our credit more than our jobs can pay us, right? Oh well, I guess not everyone shares my justification. Anyway, this movie shows how we can still be beautiful and popular without having to be mean like Rebecca Gayheart’s character. And without having to choke of jawbreaker candy.

Narrator: First you need to know something about them. The beautiful ones. The flawless four. Everyone wanted to be them. You know 'em they went to your school too. They totally ruled…

 

Ally McBeal

Before all these hyped TV shows, there was ONLY Ally McBeal (oh okay, and Friends). Everyone, who thought of themselves as mentally ill found comfort and justice in the person of Ally McBeal. The child in us that could see unicorns, the mother in us that sees dancing babies, the primate in us that wants to have random sex with car wash attendants, the insanity in us that feels gratified when we get to suck fingers—all these oddities that we have in us find lawyers here. Before Sex and The City, this was the only show which made me cry, laugh, and feel horny. I was definitely old enough when I watched Ally McBeal and so many lines in the show spoke to so many me, or to so many people who saw themselves in the colorful characters of the show.  This show also gave me the idea that beautiful and successful women can be strange and that’s normal. God, I miss Portia de Rossi and Lucy Liu!

Ling Woo: I'm rich. I only go into work to wear my outfits!

 

The Devil Wears Prada

When going to work feels like a drag, I watch the opening to get inspiration to get dressed and go to work.

Miranda Priestly: This... stuff'? Oh. Okay. I see. You think this has nothing to do with you. You go to your closet and you select... I don't know... that lumpy blue sweater, for instance because you're trying to tell the world that you take yourself too seriously to care about what you put on your back. But what you don't know is that that sweater is not just blue, it's not turquoise. It's not lapis. It's actually cerulean…

 

Pretty Woman

Every girl loves a fairy tale. Especially if it appeals to that sluts in us that shout, “we deserve to be loved!”

Vivian: Did I mention, my leg is 44" from hip to toe. So basically we are talking about 88" of therapy, wrapped around you for the bargain price of 3000 dollars.

 

The Day After Tomorrow

This is the perfect movie to watch when it’s unbearably cold, you’d feel like you’re in the movie too. This was the movie my housemates and I were watching during Ondoy. We were so into the movie that we actually enjoyed the heavy downpour and I imagined running crazily to avoid being hit by an enormous wave. And then outside my movie-themed day were Ondoy and all its victims. Lord. Anyway, back to the movie, it was an expected Hollywood spectacle, something that we need to enjoy sometimes.

Other films/shows that I think should be in every Transgirl’s collection:

Brokeback Mountain

Sex and The City

Mean Girls

Charmed

X-Men: The Animated Series

Legally Blonde

To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar

Meteor Garden

So now it’s typhoon season, make sure you ready your emergency kits and enjoy lazy days in your little home theaters.

 

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Photo by Eva Callueng. Some rights reserved.

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