Trumping the notion of 'Dating a Girl Who Reads' vs. 'Dating an Illiterate Girl'

...and then, there's this debate between dating a girl who reads and who doesn't.

Valentine's Day. One day of the year that everyone has the license to be either bitter or madly in love, depending on your emotional state.

For the first time in three years, I'm spending mine alone, but I'm choosing to not be on either side of the spectrum and to just keep myself open to whatever possibility there is on the strangest day of the year as people go stark raving crazy for this thing called love.

And then, there's this debate between dating a girl who reads and who doesn't.

I have been a reader ever since I could remember: from "light reading" about the US and USSR Space Race that peaked in the late 1960s, to adventuring through Charlie and The Chocolate Factory, to relating to the life of Holden Caulfield in Catcher in the Rye. So while it has never particularly been an issue for me, the notion of judging eligibility by literacy is interesting for me.

However, let's find an alternative to the arguments currently making the rounds right now and go with the anti-thesis of both sides of the spectrum. So I say this: just let go and come what may.

Why am I saying this? Because I've been on either side of the spectrum. I've dated girls who read and don't read. And usually, it all ends the same. Only the journey is different.

I once dated a girl who read the Shopaholic series, while still reading what is being considered books for young adults like The Phantom Tollbooth and The Stinky Cheese Man and Other Fairly Stupid Tales. She loved shopping, chocolate and the arts.

I never really found out exactly why I really liked this girl, but she was well-versed like me: she was into sports and she appreciated the arts and some of the finer things in life even if she was living a pretty lavish lifestyle that was somewhat beyond my means.

The ending was not so pleasant: I just kept my distance from her for weeks after my birthday since I was feeling pretty much distressed, and she ended up sending me this long text message on my sister's birthday that effectively ended our nearly-one year relationship.

I guess we bumped into a phantom tollbooth of our own. When we got back to the "real world," everything had changed.

Afterwards, I met a Korean girl who didn't really like to read. She was a party girl, well-dressed, and mild-mannered.

What drew me into her was this idea that she'd be different from others that I've met before because she was raised in a foreign country (South Korea), and that I had a lot to learn from someone like her.

However, things didn't really pan out and my interest for her waned like the sunset, since conversations with her lacked the depth that I wished to have and had with others I have dated before.

After we broke up, I met a girl who had been interested in me for the longest time. She read new-age books about religion, God, and the like. She liked the simple things: walking around places, playing scrabble, and going on food trips.

A more down-to-earth lady, she lived a more reserved life that strayed away from most modern social norms, such as refusing to open a Facebook or Twitter account. Her preference for walking instead of commuting to certain places was a big plus for me.

She was interesting, and we had fun for a while. In the end, though, a simple mistake tore us apart.

Things will end eventually. There has never been a magic formula on getting things right. It's hard.

No two women are the same. Even two literate girls or two girls who don't really read have their differences

If one were to dive right into dating someone, no matter who they are, it's best to get to know the person by conversing with her. Guesswork is not the best way to go. Stereotypes of girls exist but nobody ever really fits exactly into the molds.

Sure, girls may read the same books and have the same mannerisms, but they will never be a carbon copy of each other and there will always be different ways that they tick.

If there's a piece of advice I would like to impart, it's this: let things happen. If you really wish for something to ever happen, just set the ropes free from the harbor where you are docked and the rest will follow.